Couples Coachingpar Simon Beauséjour
Behind every great man is a great woman; and behind every great woman is a great man, we all know that.
But I have seen some cases where the husband or wife is not behind the spouse, but in fact in front -and in the way- preventing that great man or woman to come out.
Couples Coaching is quickly becoming more and more popular. It is not to be automatically associated with couples that experience marital problems, but rather with couples that already enjoy a great relationship and want to take it to the next level.
In some of those cases, there are couples for which there is stress coming from the fact that one of the spouses is having success with his or her job or business while the other is stagnant. That is precisely when one can end up standing in the way of the other; without even being conscious of his or her reaction and of the consequences of jealousy, envy, loneliness or other emotions that may not be well managed. That is definitely a time when honest and open communication is crucial from both sides: from the spouse that feels somewhat left behind as well as the one that is moving forward.
With every movement comes change, and with every change comes a need for adjustment. In the case of a couple, that need is in fact doubled-up. Any husband or wife moving into an important job promotion, a career change or a start-up or expansion of a business (which will usually represent increased travel and time spent away from home) needs make sure he or she evaluates the indirect price his or her spouse will inevitably have to pay. As part of the impact of the personal and professional growth process, priorities need to be set straight with the spouse.
A couple, like a job or business, needs periodic evaluation, feedback and adjustment; lack of which will add severe stress on either -or both- spouses. From there will arise more disagreements and turbulence from which both entities are bound to suffer: the job or business project and the couple.
A healthy couple will remain so if it chooses to give itself the tools required to find balance during periods of change. A Couples Coach then becomes their best bet. Like any coach, the Couples Coach will bring an outside point of view into the process, along with life experience and a well equipped toolbox. The Coach will demonstrate that there is no need for a winner and a loser, but only for two winners. The couple will be guided into reconciliation of all the desired priorities of both individuals.
Don't forget this concept: the person you are most likely to have a car accident with is... your husband or wife! Simply because he or she is the person you drive around the most, since he or she is the person you spend the most time around. And that is a reflection of your everyday life as a couple: you bump into each other's good times and bad times; each other's projects, ambitions and disappointments; each other's angry and happy moments. That is the deal with marriage: a commitment to accompany and support each other in order to bring out the best in both.
As couples will sometimes bump into each other's car and cause either a small scratch or a serious fender bender, the automobile repairman will need to become part of the couple's solutions.
And so will the Couples Coach...
Drive safely! And enjoy the ride.
